Avast! If ye be new to this vessel, partake in the lootin' with our Arrrrh! S.S. (RSS), Matey!

What a great gift for any of your nautical neighbors. It probably won’t help all that much if your house were to flood, but it’s perfect for kicking your feet up at night and dreaming of the open waters. It comes complete with mini oars, to make it feel more authentic as well. If you really intend on trying to ride it, please test it in a pool though first (our legal department made us say that). $400.

If you spend too much time with your computer for gaming or work, then you might need the Pro Gaming Table. This multi function table offers the multi-tiered design to fit all of your gaming peripherals, up to three 21-inch LCD monitors, printer, etc. $379.

If you always need the time and want a table that shows you the time, then this 24ct bespoke table from Goldstriker might be a perfect considering it shows you the time with a large LED display. Thing is, it’s shaped like a nice gold watch for a freakin’ giant. How cool is that? Pretend you climbed a beanstalk to get to your own home, and of course drink your coffee on a giant watch every morning. $43,000.

Don’t you hate it when you wake up in the middle of the night and can’t see the time? You wont have to worry anymore with this giant LED clock that not only serves as a clock, but doubles as several shelves to put all your stuff and books in for better organization.

Pimp out your dining area with this interlock furniture glassing dining table. It features a birch plywood base with interlocking frames for support and serves as the centerpiece with a frame inspired by classic Asian architecture. It also has a separate line of chairs in case you don’t have ones that match. $1,350.

Wanna view something privately? Now you can with the Shelf Projection Screen by Liv’it Fly. It features an anodized aluminum shelf that doubles as a little projection screen. Perfect for private pr0n viewing in your bedroom. $1900.

Morgan Grays office chairs feature a patented suspension technique, an articulated seat pan, and a three dimensional back cradling tension knit. It is available in black or polished aluminum hardware, and contrast leather piping. $1,950.

Make Sting proud with the Tantra Chair, which happens to be inspired by a woman’s shape and body. It was designed to heighten the effectiveness of wild sexual positions found in the Kama Sutra. The Tantra Chair is built from solid hardwood and features a champagne foam seat cushion with two arcs (one being bigger than the other) and a central contour for the switching of angles for both support and pleasure. $1000.